Attack of the Mini-Cons
by VampireGirl1345
Summary: I got really bored. So I started typing out how I wish Christmas break had went. Don't hate it, if you do that's fine. The Decepticons have had an unfortunate accident that's left them only a few inches tall and stuck with me for a couple weeks. So, this happens...
1. Chapter 1

It was 2:37 a.m. Still awake. With another sigh I turn onto my right side, only to hear a muffled yelp and feel something small and pointy sticking in my side. With that I sat bolt right up, jumped out of bed and searched for the flashlight. Upon finding it I turned it on and almost fainted from what I was seeing. The " thing " I had rolled on was none other then... Starscream; a 6 inch tall Starscream. I mean the REAL Starscream, not a toy (I don't own one of them.) Which Starscream you ask? The Transformers: Prime version, no doubt about it. It definitely wasn't the movie version of him since he didn't look like a Dorito chip with arms, legs, and an ugly face. Anyway, he stared up at me with a sheepish expression on his face.

Of course I was startled so I hissed at him "WHY are you in my bed?!" He immediately went into groveling mode and replied "I am dreadfully sorry, human girl ,but I was kicked out of the Nemesis so..." I cut him off. "So? Go to sleep in one of my socks then, NOT in my bed." He then said, "I tried but it was too cold", while saying that he gave me his best puppy dog eyes. After that all I did was roll my own eyes. Taking the opportunity, I asked some very obvious questions: "Why are you so small, Starscream?" Startled he squawked out "How do you know my name?!" I replied "Type the words 'Transformers: Prime' into the Internet search and you'll see." 10 minutes later a very shocked Starscream muttered "Oh... That's how..." I just nodded. Continuing with my questions I then said "Well, why are you so small?" Starscream tapped his fingers together before explaining "The groundbridge malfunctioned so all of the Vehicon troopers and Insecticons are stranded, and waiting for pick-up. Megatron decided to leave them there, while the Nemesis flew to the Autbots location..." With that I scowled, thinking the Decepticons knew where to find the Autobot's base, which would be very bad news for all Autobot fans. Not noticing Starscream continued "Not their base but a new energon deposit located in Chile. Well, somehow the shrink-ray energon input amount was miscalculated and it exploded over, erm, oh yes! Canada." I interrupted "Stop. I know. So, some genius guided the ship into my room?" He nodded.

On that happy note I sighed. For it being 3:00 in the morning this was too much to take in. Knowing sleep would be impossible now, I said to Starscream "OK. Well...um...that's a lot to take in so...will you be leaving soon?" All the while hoping the answer would be a simple ' yes '. But unfortunately his reply was " No. The effects of the shrink-ray won't wear off until two weeks have passed. Therefore, the Decepticons will have to stay with you." He didn't look happy about that at all. Me? I don't care, I'm not fangirl crazy about him, he murdered Cliffjumper and I kind of hate him for doing that. To my own surprise I just sighed again and muttered "whatever" before climbing back into my bed. Starscream asked me "Well, what about me? Can I sleep in your bed?" I was almost asleep for real and blearily said "Yeah." He had the stupid idea of asking "Where?". Angrily I replied "Not near me you derp! Now SHUT UP and let me sleep!" I FINALLY went to sleep, but was unfortunately aware that Starscream had curled up next to my head on the pillow, where he also fell asleep. Two-faced lying jerk. Do I look like a walking heater?


	2. Chapter 2

Upon waking up I thought what had happened last night, well technically a few hours ago, the clock read 6:45 a.m, was a really elaborate lucid dream. Until I realized that I woke up to still 6 inch tall Starscream sitting up and poking me in the head with almost needle-like fingers. Still angry for being deprived of sleep and getting poked mercilessly in the head I swatted him and he ended up smacking into the door, forgetting he could fly out of complete surprise. I planed on trying to sleep in but then Starscream remembered he could fly and landed on the bed again. He calmly said "I would advise preparing yourself for the day. Unless you wish to speak to the Decepticons currently aboard the Nemesis in nightclothes?" Scrap! I thought. After hearing that I rushed around grabbing my clothes and ran into the bathroom to shower and change. After showering, drying my hair , brushing my teeth and getting dressed in a pair of jeans, Geox™sneakers, and a Diesel™ sweatshirt, I left the bathroom. I strapped on my red watch, checking the time. It was 7:48 a.m. I walked back to my bedroom. A scowling Starscream stood on the floor, tapping his foot.

I looked down on him and asked "What do you have your wings in a twist over?" His reply came out dripping with exasperation " You took far too long, human girl. I could have scrubbed the whole..."My name is Alexis, STOP calling me 'human girl' you dumb waste of space!" I hissed out, stopping his own little rant in it's tracks. Looking a bit taken back he continued "Well, while you got ready, *sigh* luckily nobody else awoke." Raising my left eyebrow I asked "Lucky for who? You? Oh.. I see, you're scared of Megatron so you want me to talk to him instead. Typical, pathetic lil' Screamy has to hide behind a stronger person." Trying to restore a little dignity he shouted "NO! For the both of us, imbec- Alexis. Unless your parents would be alright with so-called 'evil' robotic organisms living in the house for a fortnight, and running amok?" Believing his trump card had won him his dignity back he smirked and crossed his arms over his chest. But I was just as quick thinking: "Well, last I checked you were evil and who said I would let all of you 'cons run around my home?" Starscream frowned and pursed his lips. I continued "They won't even know because they're on a Christmas break vacation in Rome and you'll be gone before they get back."

Starscream in a stiff, prideful voice spat out "So?! Get to the point, ALEXIS." Grinning from ear-to-ear I swiftly replied "My point? You're whole concern speech about me getting in trouble was just a cover up for your REAL fear, Screamy. The other point? You are a nothing but a blabbering wimp who needs to use big words to hide his small, if not non-existent, amount of courage." I then said under my breath "Round 1: Point goes to me!" A very abashed and shocked Starscream simply stared at the ground. I jumped startled by a deep, evil chuckle and slow clap, coming from behind me. Whipping my head around toward the sound I looked at an 8 inch tall Megatron leisurely strolling out of the Nemesis ship. He said to me " Well. For once it seems I have met a human with a sharp mind and tongue. Tell me human girl..."I snapped at him "I HAVE A NAME, YOU KNOW!" Sighing, I continued "It's Alexis." Megatron just kept walking with his customary angry expression back. He walked right up to a shaking Starscream who was, by now, cowering behind my ankle. I pushed Starscream closer to Megatron with my foot and said "Don't be so scared, Screamy. Megatron doesn't bite...but I hear he does punch."


	3. Chapter 3

After I said that the Nemesis's door opened again to reveal a whining and splattered with blue paint Knockout in the middle of a rant, directed at...Breakdown? I thought he was dead, because Arachnid had gutted him. So, naturally I ignored whatever Megatron was shouting in Starscream's face and took two steps over to Knockout and Breakdown, where both of them had started their own shouting match, regarding the wrong coloured paint being spilled on both of them. Knockout hollered "You are a clumsy, stupid oaf! MY FINISH WAS WRECKED AND YOU GO AHEAD AND SPLATTER IT WITH BLUE PAINT!" Breakdown bellowed back "SO IT'S MY FAULT YOU SPILLED RED PAINT IN MY ONLY OPTIC AND I WAS BLINDED?!" Since they were already shouting enough to give me a headache, I decided to frighten them into silence "Awwww! You two are arguing like an old married couple! So cute." It worked. They stared at me, looking completely horrified, causing me to burst out in laughter. Between gasps for air I managed to sputter out "...just...haha...kidding...hahaha..." Knockout snapped at me "Well, you're a funny one, aren't you human girl." I was so sick and tired of getting called 'human girl', so I picked up the 5 inch tall Knockout.

I hissed at him "I'm so sick of all you morons calling me by a species list! Next time, TRY TO REMEMBER I HAVE A NAME AND BOTHER TO ASK WHAT IT IS!" After that I realized my hand was stinging, you know painfully. It hurt so bad I honestly forgot I was still holding Knockout and I started wringing and shaking my hand, yelping all the while. Meanwhile, poor Knockout went flying and hit his head on the wall before falling...into Soundwave's tentacles. Yikes! Now Dreadwing and Arachnid are fighting, Starscream has passed out from his injuries, Breakdown is trying to smash my foot because I hurt Knockout, with the real intent to kill, despite the fact he was only 6.5 inches tall; and Soundwave and Megatron are just standing there laughing their heads off. Well, Megatron is, Soundwave can't actually laugh, but if he could he definitely would be! This scenario was enough to give me a very painful and rare headache, despite the fact the Decepticons were only a few inches tall, so I yelled, at them "SHUT UP YOU STUPID PEICES OF SCRAP METAL! STOP MOVING AROUND, JUST FOR TWO MINUTES, CAN YOU ALL DO THAT?! Honestly all of you are a waste of good building materials, you do NOTHING useful, no wonder the Autobots always kick your butts!" With the insult sunk into their brains everything went quiet and all of the Decepticons turned toward me and stared.

Taking the chance to try and fix the situation I said "Good. You're all quiet. Now, is Starscream getting up on his own?" Megatron snorted "Please. If you were blind you could still tell that he is not getting up on his own." I face palmed. An idea had formed, but it was slightly hazardous to my health. "Worth a shot." I muttered. Stepping over to my sock drawer that actually contained art supplies, I rummaged around until I found the roll of heavy-duty duct tape. Tearing off a strip, approximately 13 inches long I stuck the end of it on the dresser. I raised my head toward the ceiling and I sighed then whispered " Please give me patience.", before pouncing and grabbing a now furious, cursing, thrashing Megatron, and wrapping him in the strip of heavy-duty duct tape. I wrapped his head too, preventing him from spewing out a stream of profanities. One troublesome 'con down, one to go. Placing the duct tape wrapped Megatron in one of the few cardboard boxes in my room, I tore off another strip, 9 inches long this time and snatched up an equally foul-mouthed, 4.5 inch tall Arachnid. Once she was wrapped in the duct tape, I place her in the same box that held Megatron. I announced "For today all you Decepticreeps are going to listen to me!" I really don't think I'm going to survive the next couple of weeks, if everyday is like today.


	4. Chapter 4

I talked to Breakdown first "Can you stop trying to smash my foot? I'm sorry for flinging Knockout into the wall, the type of paint you use apparently causing humans to get a painful skin rash. So, not my fault really." He grunted and stood off to the side, before walking over to his unconscious friend. Next problem: Soundwave had unceremoniously dumped Knockout on my floor, so that Dreadwing and him could try to free Megatron from the cardboard box and duct tape bindings. "At least" I thought "They're ignoring Arachnid, I hate spiders, but she tops the list of of really, REALLY, creepy-crawlies." Sighing I looked at my watch, it read 8:23 a.m. I'm supposed to be eating breakfast by now while watching the T.V, not baby-sitting mini-Decepticons! Crazy does not begin to describe the situation right now. I said to Dreadwing "Stop it. Megatron is not getting out of the duct tape or box today. I'm in charge of you morons, no offense, for the whole day." Dreadwing scowled and proclaimed, yes proclaimed "I am only loyal to Lord Megatron,I will never follow a fleshling, no matter their size... I stopped him "Well I'm not gonna make you 'Cons do much today, so...um... think of it as a day off." Soundwave turned toward me and nodded, while Dreadwing stomped off in a hot temper, muttering 'stupid...humans...not fair...' all the while.

"Are they always so childish?" I muttered. I didn't realize Soundwave had moved to stand up on a book pile and heard my comment, until he poked me in the arm with one of his tentacles. My reaction: "GAHHH, what was that...oh, hi Soundwave what do you need?" Another tentacle pointed at my well beloved (A/N: Yeah that laptop ain't working right now :-( ) laptop resting in the case. Shrugging I powered up the MacBook Pro and turned the screen toward Soundwave. He pointed at the 'Pages' icon. I opened it to a blank white screen, with the cursor ready. Soundwave jumped down from the book stack and started to type! When he was done typing the screen read 'Yes,while all the Decepticons are whiny, Knockout, Starscream, and Dreadwing are very childish.' I laughed and typed back 'Good one, Soundwave.' He typed again 'What do you mean by "good one"?' I replied 'That means you're funny.' He nodded and walked into the Nemesis. That left me scratching my head, thinking "Did I just have a friendly chat with a silent, cold-blooded, über- loyal- to- Megatron, Decepticon spy? To quote Knockout, awkward!" Next problem: a screeching Knockout. He was jumping up and down yelling "MY FINISH! MY PAINT, IT'S ALL RUINED!" I said to him "Calm down. I can fix that." An emotionally wrecked Knockout replied "Please do. Please, please, please Alexis." (A/N: That's not my real name.)

Breakdown rolled his optic. Can't blame him, his partner, BFF, bro, whatever you want to call him was begging me to fix his paint job, like he would beg me not to kill him. Without saying a word I searched my room for the small jar of blood red touch-up paint and cleaning cloth. First of all, I wiped the wrong coloured paint off of a protesting Breakdown, then cleaned up a distraught Knockout. From my very impressive array of paintbrushes, I selected a soft point-tipped micro brush, and a medium-sized bristle brush. Opening the jar of touch-up paint I warned Knockout "If you don't stay still while I fix your paint job, I will tie you to a stick and pour paint thinner all over you. Got it?" He nodded. I set to work. I picked up Knockout and placed him on the table beside my bed, where I could kneel down and paint at a more comfortable angle. Using the larger brush first I dipped it in the touch-up paint and carefully painted over the scratches on his chest and limbs. With the micro brush I painted over the scratches on his head and anywhere else I missed before. About 20 minutes later, I told Knockout "It's done and the paint is dry too." After finding the nearest reflective surface ( that would be my mirror), he said to me "Well, someone is an artist, remarkable work, Alexis." Realizing Knockout meant that and that his old swagger was back, I was thoroughly confused and squeaked out "...umm...thanks? Can you fix Starscream up then?"


	5. Chapter 5

Before Knockout could reply to my request, a screech sounded out. Apparently, while I chatted with Soundwave and fixed Knockout's paint, Dreadwing had flown up to the box that held Megatron and Arachnid, and accidentally freed Arachnid instead of Megatron from the duct tape. Though Dreadwing realized his mistake very quickly when Arachnid dug her extra legs, and pincers into his chest. Dreadwing dropped to his knees slowly leaking out energon, but swung his sword at Arachnid, cutting off two of her extra legs. Furiously Arachnid shouted "You IDIOT! Look at what you did!" OK then, crazy bots. I said to Knockout "Now can you fix up Arachnid, Dreadwing, AND Starscream?" He just shrugged and replied "It's not unusual to have to fix most of these squabbling idiots, all at the same time *sigh*." I couldn't help but chuckle at what Knockout just said. Soundwave dragged over the leaking and unconscious Dreadwing over to the Nemesis, and ignored a very ticked off Arachnid. She was cursing Dreadwing in English and Cybertronian (I think). "Would it kill you to stop swearing so much? You nearly killed Dreadwing, and he's not cursing you in two different languages. All he did was slice off two extra legs. Easy fix, right?" I told her. She hissed "What would a HUMAN know about us Decepticons? Can you even spell the word out, hmmm?" I scowled and instead of answering her, I tore off another 9 inch long strip of duct tape, then proceed to re-wrap her in it.

Back in the box she went, alongside a slightly wriggling duct tape wrapped Megatron. "Is she O.K?" Breakdown asked. That REALLY surprised me. Why would he care so much about- Then it hit me. I remembered a scene from episode 22 when Breakdown was talking to a Vehicon. He said "Yeah, she's kinda domineering and the extra arms are weird, but I find myself intrigued by her." I replied "Your not-so-secret-crush is fine." "What's a crush?" I sighed "A crush is when you really like a person and want to date them. It's human terminology." At that Breakdown "Why would I have a crush on that spider-femme?!" "Because" I answered "Love is very blind!" Breakdown growled "Alexis, if that was some sort of joke about my missing optic...I'm warnin' ya." To save my own skin I said "No, no, no. It's not a joke about your optic...I literally mean that love is blind. It doesn't let you see the person your in love with's faults." Breakdown grunted "Huh, whatever." Then, Knockout walked out from the Nemesis and announced "Herr Kommandant and Dreadwing are both stable, all thanks to my excellent medical skills."

I just sighed. Turning to Soundwave who was just standing on top of the mini-Nemesis I asked him "Can I trust you to watch over the 'cons not wrapped in duct tape?" But Soundwave seemed distracted by something beeping on his visor screen. Knockout strolled over and looked at the readings. He seemed to be trying to hold back laughter. "Um...do I even wanna know what is so funny?" Breakdown had the same expression on his face, too. Knockout said "Oh, nothing, just a stray Eradicon who decided to stay behind." At that, Soundwave...face-palmed. Breakdown asked "Would this Eradicon be called ST-3V3, Starscream's most loyal follower.? "Yes." Knockout chuckled. Soundwave just walked away at that point, leaving Knockout and Breakdown staring at me while I laughed my head off, before they joined in too. (A/N If you know about ST-3V3, you'll see why it's funny.)


	6. It's not an update

So, I'm stuck for inspiration on my Attack of the Mini-Cons fanfic. I'm so sorry! Homework and projects are starting to REALLY hurt...they killed the plot bunny! But, a new plot bunny has been born...in the middle of math homework. I'll be coming back to this story, sometime.


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